I'm leavin...

on a train to Rome in t-minus two and a half hours. How did this happen? Where did the time go? I am so incredibly sad to be leaving this town I have come to love, and people I have become so close with, for goodness knows how long.

Last night, my friends and I went out for one last night to this really weird/american club. It wouldn't have been fun to go every weekend, but it was perfect for the last night. I got home teary eyed and so sad about saying goodbye and found a wonderful picture, above left, from my friends. HOW WONDERFUL IS THAT?? It made my night, and has made it so much easier to contemplate coming home.

Tonight, I'll be staying in Rome and tomorrow I'll be leaving for Scotland. I'll be there for four and a half days before I head on home.

Today, in a few hours, I have to say goodbye to my host mother until I don't know when, and I can't even fathom how many tears there will be. But thanks to some good friends, I know remember what beautiful people I'm coming home to :)

i'm thankful...

That six months ago, I made the best decision of my life. I can distinctly remember spring break of 2010 sitting in my living room and trying to decide: Italy/South Africa, Italy/South Africa. My friends at school had made a poll, and South Africa was winning by a landslide. I had just spent January there, and I think really everyone was expecting me to go back and do the civil justice work I am so passionate about it.

But then, sitting there in that living room, I started dreaming in another direction. My mom asked me to simply talk about these two countries, talk about what was drawing me in either direction, to see if that might help. I myself didn't feel I was truly swayed in one direction or the other, but to my parents it was clear. "Your face just lights up when you talk about Italy!" Once I heard her say that, I had to admit it was true. I had always loved the idea of getting back to that particular part of my ancestry, and the more I thought about it, the bigger my smile became. It was decided: go with what makes you happy.

The next six months I kept wondering if I'd made the right choice, not knowing if this meant I'd never again get to see South Africa. I was terrified the day I got on the plane, and was practically sobbing when I said goodbye to my mom at the airport.

But now, during the week that my home country gives thanks, I'd like to shout from the rooftops that I am thankful for ITALY and its presence in my life. Sitting around a thanksgiving table in a tennis club in Florence with wonderful new friends, and a woman who has truly become my Italian Mamma, I couldn't stop smiling.

This is absolutely the place for me. When I decided to go to St. Olaf, I told everyone I wanted to try the midwest because I didn't want to live in the same town my whole life and then one day, at 65 be on a train through the midwest and think "wow, I should have lived here!". Little did I know that when I chose to stretch myself by going to St. Olaf, I'd be opening up a world of opportunity. Not only was I able to experience the midwest, I was also able to find a whole new country that in every way feels like home.

I sort of wish this experience could go on forever, even though there are of course things and people I miss back home. I really hope that this isn't my final taste of Italy, because now, after 3 and a half months, it really feels like home.

I'm also thankful for all of YOU who read my blog, send me emails, and generally send good thoughts. I miss you all and I hope your thanksgivings were as thankful and joy filled as mine!

back home and then back to italy

Hello all!

I am back in Italy after having returned to America for a week. I went to Boston from Italy, spent a few days there and then flew into LAX. It was a jam packed four days, first a viewing, then the burial and then the funeral (and on the last day, my brothers birthday) and it was exhausting. I am so so glad that I went home, because being with my family is just what I needed. I hadn't seen some of my cousins in years (which is a big deal for my very tight knit family) and my other grandparents and wonderful tante came down as well. It all finally felt real while I was back in Claremont, surrounded by grief and by memories. It was really hard, but I was lucky enough to have friends and family all around me. In fact, my best friend drove all the way from Santa Cruz just to be at the funeral. It's a week I won't ever forget, and I'm forever grateful to everyone in my family who made it happen.

That sunday, I spent almost 24 hours traveling to get back to Florence. One of the girls on my program put it really well when she asked "does it feel like you just went to space and then came back?" Yes. That's EXACTLY how it felt. There was no such thing as time and food was just an extra thing that people did to feel polite...It was a weird week getting back on track, but I'm feeling confident that I'll be able to catch up on everything and finish all my work before I go back home for real.

Which is so soon! I only have three and a half weeks left to be here!! My roommate and I have decided we have a lot to do in that time, and we're ready to get cracking. It's still kind of hard to be here, and the grief and jet lag both still hit me in exhausting waves, but I'm determined to soak up as much as I can in the time I have left. My Grammie loved to travel, and specifically loved Italy and I know that she's watching me and waiting for me to enjoy these three weeks as much as possible.

That's just my little update, love to you all from Florence!

Amy

Travel, and coming back home

Ciao tutti!

Last saturday, I got back from a weeklong travel to Belgium and Spain. The travel was nice, and coming back home was wonderful. I got off the plane and shouted "ITALY!" I was so happy to be back in a country that I love. It was wonderful to see more of Europe, but it also only confirms that I love Italy and really feel at home here.

The night I got back, I wound up going out to dinner alone. I was feeling kind of lonery for going out alone, but was glad to eat my favorite pasta at my favorite place. I wound up sitting next to two Australians, who I became fast friends with. We spent 3 hours chatting, and they let me try all their food (including cow stomach...better believe it!) and then bought me after-dinner wine. They gave me their email and told me if I ever found myself in Melbourne, Australia, to call them. It was wonderful and I walked home feeling like I was on cloud nine.

That was not, however, a good night for my family. Saturday night my Grammie Ellen woke up in the middle of the night throwing up so violently that she was admitted to the hospital. I called her the next day to see how she was doing. In her typical fashion, she didn't want to talk about how she was. What she really wanted was to talk about Italy, hear about my travels, and wish me blessings on the rest of my journey. I told her to rest and that I'd call her in the morning. However, soon after (I don't know if it was Sunday night or Monday night) she went into respiratory failure and had to be put on a ventilator.

A few days later, quietly, peacefully, and surrounded by loving family members, she passed away.

Now I am in Italy feeling overwhelmed by grief, and simultaneously overwhelmed by my inability to grieve so far from home and my family. I'm going to go home for the funeral, and am so grateful to be surrounded by love here in Italy. My host mother, roommate, and professors, and in fact everyone on the program, have been especially understanding. Everyone has encouraged me to go go GO and be with my family. Next weekend, I'll go to Rome with the group and fly out from there.

On a happier note, my cousin Laura delivered a wonderful, beautiful healthy baby boy this week. Little David was born just one day before my grandmother passed. This week has been all about teaching me the circle of life.

Thank you all for your support, please send prayers to my family

Amy

Mi piace

The verb in Italian for “like” is “piace”. When you like something, you say “mi piace!”. Up until yesterday, I was translating this in my head as “I like!” But yesterday, our Italian professor pointed out to us that this actually translates as it likes me.

Do you know how much this changes for me?

When my Italian Mom was discussing my likes/dislikes, what she ACTUALLY said was “Broccoli likes you, but cauliflower doesn’t”. Which is exactly how I would describe it!

Once again, feeling blessed to be somewhere where I’m free to like whichever foods I do, and eat only that which LIKES ME!

small update, I know, but I'm also busily preparing for Jacob's arrival tomorrow!

Venezia

Ciao tutti!
I have just returned (well, last night) from a weekend stay in Venice! I've uploaded all my pictures to Facebook, and for some reason I'm having a difficult time uploading them here. But let me just say, it was extremely beautiful! I think it was my favorite few days in Italy, for a lot of reasons.

First of all, I got to be away from the loud hustle and bustle of Florence, which does get old after a while. Because there are no cars in Venice, it's much quieter than Florence ever is. That was extremely nice. I also found it a very, very beautiful picturesque city. There was so much to do and see, and everywhere you went it was clear YOUR IN ITALY! It was just as stereotypically scenic as you'd imagine it to be. I couldn't believe that I was really there, really in Venice, and really got to be surrounded by a place I'd dreamed of going to since I was a little girl. We went on a gondolier ride on the very first day, which was a wonderful experience. One of my professors was kind enough to give us her morning and take us all on a walking tour so we could see the main sights of Venice. It's an incredibly difficult city to navigate, so it was wonderful to have our professors show us around. We also got a semi-private tour of the Basillica...just a breathtaking place in general. The next day we went to Padua (the namesake for my former neighborhood from senior year) and tour a chapel there which Giotto painted the interior of. Sunday, we went to the Peggy Guggenheim museum and got to see much more contemporary art. Wonderful to be surrounded by beauty in so many forms...

The other awesome part was that we were all in a hotel together. It's been kind of hard for us all to coordinate hanging out, since a lot of us live pretty far away. But with everyone staying in one place, it was really easy to hang out with new people and just have a good time. That was some much needed relaxation and breaking of those first groups you tend to get immeshed in when you're in this kind of situation. New friends, fun times, and lots and lots of bonding :)

This week is our second week of the full course schedule. My favorite class so far is my drawing class. On the first day, when the instructors explained to us what we would be doing I about left I was so intimidated. I kept thinking "I've never done this before! I'm going to be terrible at it!". But I took a deep breath and did it anyway, all the while thinking of my dear Grandma Helen who started drawing later than I in life and is now a wonderfully accomplished and experienced artist. She definitely inspires me when that class gets difficult or I get overwhelmed. Thank you Grandma for setting such a wonderful example of how to be a courageous, adventurous woman!

Also helpful is my new friend Alyse who draws next to me. She is taking the opportunity to become a teacher to me. Where she could be insulting or ignore me, she gently corrects me and teaches me new ways to learn and grow. How wonderful to be surrounded by friends like these :)

I am also continuing my Italian course and taking two courses genearally geared towards art history. Drawing, however, is my favorite. I find it extremely relaxing and enjoyable to try something completely new in life.

I'm loving the emails you are all sending me and will try to respond slowly as the internet is available. It feels so nice to be contacted by all my wonderful family and friends! Love to all

Amy

American in Florence

Once again, I ask all my loyal readers to be kind to someone they have the urge to make fun of. This week, when you see a tourist taking a stupid picture, or walking in front of a car, be kind to them.

Because this week, I was that tourist in Italy. The night began on Tuesday with my roommate Madeline and I getting ready to go to see Porgy and Bess at the Theater in downtown Florence. I got all dolled up in a dress and heels, not realizing that the theater was about a 45 minute walk from here. By the time I made it half way, I had such strong blisters on my feet I thought that there were rocks in my shoes. I walked the second half of the way in pain, but unwilling to dirty my feet before the show had even started.

The show itself was really interesting. The music is all in English, but it was really hard to understand what the singers were saying. I’m not sure if it was the acoustics or if it was their accents, but it was interesting to not understand my own language! Also, they don’t turn the lights off for shows at this theater. They dim them, but they don’t turn them off. This meant that in addition to some wonderful music, I got to do some really great people watching. Including drooling over the wonderful dresses/shoes I saw others wearing. They sure know how to dress here.

So the show raps up and my friends and I begrudgingly put our shoes back on. I barely made it out the front door by the time my feet were screaming at me. I absolutely had to take the shoes off, I saw no other choice. The first half of the walk was fine, because I was with others. Once I branched off on my own, however, I noticed some looks. Some laughs. Some people pointing at me. And some words drifted back at me from the first week “Italians find bare feet UNACCEPTABLE”. We have to wear slippers or shoes in our house at all times…so being barefoot on the streets is like…well, I don’t even know what the equivalent would be. Being naked maybe? Enough to make groups of people point and laugh. And I had to walk another twenty minutes that way.

The most frustrating part was that with the shoes on, I totally pulled off Italian. I put them back on for the briefest of moments as I walked through the Duomo (this is an area especially crowded by police, and I wasn’t really sure if it was legal to be barefoot, so I treaded on the safe side). While I had them on multiple people spoke to me in Italian. But the minute I took them off I was stamped with AMERICAN! And worse, TRASHY AMERICAN. It was quite the experience, and definitely a valuable learning experience to see what that side of being a foreigner is like.

The next day, I got the most awful migraine at 1 in the morning. I was up until 4 am doubled over in pain. Finally, I woke up my roommate and she convinced me that actually it would be a good idea to take my Tylenol PM. I had been holding off because we had a test in the morning that I didn’t want to miss. She absolutely assured me they’d let me make it up. Of course she was right, but when you’re in pain like that you can’t think. It was really nice to have a friend in that moment, since I couldn’t call home. And my program director has given me a bottle of advil to prevent against future occurances.

Finally, I got a 46/50 on my Italian final! Hoorah! It was quite a good thing I didn’t take it when I was sick, because being well enabled me to do great. I just want to say as an aside right now, it is really hard to think correctly in two languages, so my grammar/spelling is probably going to get worse on this blog as I continue. Probably really good to keep up my practice at writing in English.

Alright, that’s all for now. It’s so nice to hear from you all when I do, so please feel free to email, im or WRITE

Here’s my address, in case you don’t have it

Amy Click

c/o Linguaviva

Via Fiume, 17 50123

Firenze, Italia

I love to hear from you all, miss you and sending my best to America J